A Story for the Grandkids @HollyBargoBooks #weddings #June #weddingmishaps

Courtesy of Pixabay.com

My husband and I will celebrate our anniversary this year, 31 years after haphazard beginning.

The comedy of errors started with primping before the wedding. My mother kindly booked appointments for me and my bridesmaids to have our hair styled. The stylist ran late and, of course, I was the last to be done. The stylist rushed through doing my hair and I arrived at the church several minutes late.

In the room allotted to the bride and her party, I changed into my wedding gown. Until then, the whole getting married thing hadn’t seemed quite real. As I waited to walk down the aisle, emotion overwhelmed me. My mascara ran.

After the wedding Mass, we posed for photos in the church, including a reenactment of lighting the unity candle. My new husband dropped the crystal candlestick Mom loaned us for the ritual. It shattered on the tile. She gave us the other one as a memento.

Next, my groom and I climbed into the limousine and rode to the park where our photographer snapped some lovely photos before heading to the reception. On that June day, temperatures reached 102 degrees Fahrenheit. My makeup melted. The air conditioners at the hotel couldn’t handle the load.

The heat and humidity defeated the wedding cake. The top two tiers of a 3-tiered cake toppled over. The elegant crystal figure of doves that decorated the top tier shattered. No matter, we had plenty of other food.

When it came time to leave the reception, my new husband’s black Ford Escort had been decorated. That was expected. His 5-year old nephew helped, smearing white shoe polish over the black plastic trim. It never did fade entirely.

When we arrived at the hotel where we spent our wedding night, we heard a hiss. My husband got out of the car and, lo and behold, we had a punctured tire. The money collected in the dollar dance paid for a new tire the next morning.

We headed to Salt Fork State Park for our honeymoon, a snug cabin in the woods was both romantic and affordable. Our first day there, we went canoeing. My husband’s fair skin burned. I couldn’t touch him. The next day, I joined the party and acquired a painful sunburn, too.

Days later—finally!—when we could touch each other again without flinching in pain, we indulged in romantic newlywed activity. Unbeknown to us, the park administration had scheduled some repairs of the cabins. A locksmith was replacing doorknobs. Guess who walked right in on the newlyweds?

Had we believed in omens, we probably would have had the marriage annulled the next day. But we stuck it out and remain together 31 years and two children later.

My Latest Book

Holly Bargo has published over 20 titles since 2014. Her latest book is Triple Burn, released in April 2019. Because Holly’s a traditional sort of person, nothing really carnal happens until after the heroine and her three heroes are well and truly bonded. Then it’s all systems go! This book twists two familiar tropes—reverse harem and alien abduction romances—and twists them, taking readers on an unpredictable journey that leads to a bittersweet end.

Title:   Triple Burn

Author:   Holly Bargo

Release Date:     April 2019

Pages:   196          

Science Fiction, reverse harem

Heat Rating:       R

     A lengthy and increasingly unnerving interview lands Ursula a job as the event planner at a foreign embassy. Not until the government hustles her off to a different planet does she realize just how foreign that embassy is. When the U.S. ambassador hands over one of her coworkers during her first event as collateral to seal a trade agreement, Ursula breaks out of the embassy, determined to find a way back home before she, too, can be used as a bargaining chip in this world desperate for females. What she doesn’t know as she navigates the unfamiliar streets of a totally alien culture and climate, is that she already caught the attention of a native warrior triad in a land where women are coddled and kept, yet prized above all else. They take her, elated to have obtained their collective heart’s desire. What they don’t know is how fiercely independent a woman from Earth can be. Disoriented, confused, and not a little angry at the way these three overbearing, dominant, sexy warriors take over her life, she wants to go home, but soon discovers this job was a one-way ticket courtesy of the United States government. If she can’t go back, she must go forward. Can she retain her identify and adapt to life on this new world with the three warriors who’ve claimed her as their mate? Is compromise possible between a woman used to controlling her own life and three warriors steeped in a culture that forbids it?

Excerpt (From the Job Interview)

This is an excerpt from the job interview.

“Do you have any pets?”

“I beg your pardon?”

“Pets? Like a cat or dog?”

“Er … no. I have some tropical fish. Why?”

“This position does require relocation,” Mr. Argosie explained with a dismissive wave of his hand.

“Of course, I expect as much when working in an ambassadorial capacity.” Ursula began to strongly reconsider working for this agency. “Will relocation transfers happen often?

“Oh, no, Ms. Cartwright. We generally avoid transferring employees too frequently. We like them to get comfortable and really get to know the cultures in which they work. That can’t happen if we shuffle them around.”

Ursula nodded, although his reply sounded a bit too glib for her comfort.

Mr. Argosie rubbed his nose, looked at her, then rubbed his nose again. He leaned back in his leather upholstered executive chair, which creaked at the shift in weight, and folded his hands over his belly. He smiled and said, “Well, Ms. Cartwright, we’re happily impressed with your credentials and yourself as a well-rounded individual. Thus, I’d like to make you an offer. Can you start immediately?”

“Immediately? How soon?”

“Immediately.”

“As in right now?”

“That’s what ‘immediately’ means.”

“Um … well … I suppose, but—”

“Excellent!” he interrupted. Pressing a button on the small console on his desk, he leaned over it and said, “Ms. Ursula Cartwright has agreed to begin immediately. Please escort her to Transportation.”

“But I—”

“No, no, Ms. Cartwright, no second thoughts allowed!” He wagged his pudgy finger at her as two burly men wearing army uniforms entered the room. They flanked Ursula and each took hold of one of her upper arms. She tried to yank herself free of their grip, but couldn’t match their strength.

“Let me go!” she demanded and struggled. “What’s going on here?”

“Welcome to the Federal Agency for Foreign Relations,” Mr. Argosie answered as he heaved himself upright. The chair creaked. “You’ll be stationed in Uribern. Ambassador Gordon Hamilton is expecting your arrival momentarily. We’ll ensure your fish find a good home.”

“Uribern?” she queried, her voice going shrill. “I’ve never heard of it.” “Of course not. Only six people on Earth—including you—have,” Mr. Argosie replied as he led the way.

 Holly Bargo is a pseudonym, but really did exist as a fondly remembered Appaloosa mare. The author and her husband live on a hobby farm in southwest Ohio where they raised two children and a menagerie of horses, alpacas, llamas, rabbits, dogs, and cats. Both children are grown and the author and her husband have transitioned to the empty nest which isn’t so empty with a current collection of six cats, two horses, and one big, cowardly dog.

You can stalk her here:

     Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HenHousePublishing1/

                              Twitter: https://twitter.com/HollyBargoBooks

                              Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/henhousep/

                              Website: https://www.henhousepublishing.com

Backlist:               See my Amazon page here – https://www.amazon.com/Holly-Bargo/e/B00JRK6VGQ

Coming Soon: 

   The Eagle at Dawn – release date July 1, 2019; preorder here – https://www.amazon.com/Eagle-Dawn-Immortal-Shifters-Book-ebook/dp/B07SLP5JGT/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=the+eagle+at+dawn%2C+holly+bargo&qid=1559947165&s=digital-text&sr=1-1

Author: Cathy Brockman

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